Power Play - Do Your People Like You or Respect You?

Does your team like you or respect you?What's your response when you hear that question? Aren't the two the same?Of course we want our team to like is. Human nature dictates that we want to be liked, so it makes sense that we want our team to like us -but do we put as much thought into ensuring they respect us?So what’s the difference between being like and respected? The difference lies in how they react and respond to us as a leader – it’s in the perception they hold.Being liked = being popular with our people. Being liked is fleeting, sure you can maintain it for a time, but it’s all contingent on the next decision you make, and giving your team everything they want, you need to make every decision to win a popularity contest, which isn’t always in the best interests of the business.       Being liked also means you’re far less likely to be able to do the tough things we need to do as leaders, keep people accountable, have tough conversations etc.Being respected is far deeper and long lasting. If your people respect you, you can make unpopular decisions that are in the best interested of the business, because the team sees beyond this one decision.How do you build respect? Competence, congruence with values, do what you say you’ll do, be authentic, be fair and be accountable. While being liked might lead to short-term popularity, being respected creates a lasting impact on the team and the organization. Respected leaders inspire loyalty and commitment, as team members are more likely to go the extra mile when they respect their leader.So which game are you playing?